Friday, July 20, 2012

Eight Months


Today it is eight months since she was born.  Since I held her for a few hours before giving her away forever.

I didn't think today would be hard.  I think I expected to be getting used to the accumulation of time between her brief appearance on earth and my present life.  But I'm not used to it, not even a little.

I feel heavy.

Waking up to further tragedy didn't help.  

I am missing you, baby girl who barely was.  There are no words.


  1. I don't think you ever really get used to it. It seems like you count up the weeks and months until you are counting down the time to the birthdays/anniversaries. I've come to realize that I just can't predict how I'll be on any given day. So, I just try to go with the moment and not be too hard on myself when I have a really bad day. Praying for your peace and comfort. You are 8 months closer to seeing your girl again

  2. BIG HUGS sweetie <3 its so hard when we think about how old our children should be and what milestones they should have met. Lots of prayers for you today <3

  3. TOTALLY get you. Really struggling with living in this broken world lately. So much hurt and pain! Then I heard a quote something like, "The gospel is strong enough to equip us to live in a broken world." So true yet so hard to live by, eh? I've really been missing our girl too...especially being preggo again sometimes I think I don't want this baby enough...I want her. Hope that makes sense and not too weird. :) Will be praying for you tonight. Thanks so much for keeping it real.

  4. Praying for you Beth I know these date are difficult. Love the pretty picture, remembering Eve's LIFE with you!

  5. Praying for you Beth. I can't possibly know what you feel because I have not been through it. I had a tubular pregnacy in my early 20's (surprise that I was even pregnant)which had to be ended, but I can't possibly know the heartache you and the others bare. But I do know heartache, and I know it hurts so much you want to die sometimes, so I'm praying for you and Baby Boy every day until we see his cute little smiley face! God is Good, and He is bigger than our pain!
    Hugs from Arizona,

  6. someday... in a beautiful new home... <3 all together... <3


"I am glad you are here with me."
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King