The Beautiful Mystery of the Creatrix by Dejah Beauchamp

image by Rafael Edwards via Creative Commons

{A note from Beth: from May through August 2015, I am featuring some delicious guest writers here on the blog as I recover from pregnancy and birth and adjust to our new family rhythms (find more details here).  Enjoy!}

I don’t know why the word creatrix isn’t used more often. I think it’s a beautiful word for a woman.

A creatrix has a rich and fulfilling life, full of varied encounters and adventures. She can’t be molded, branded, or truly known. There’s always a bit of mystery about her. Her most important aspect? She creates, of course. She makes things. They can be physical things, or metaphysical things, or things for which we don’t even have a word yet.

Who are these creatrices? Well...us. Me. You.

If you’ve gotten your hands messy in paint, clay, mud, dug deep into your Self and sparked something true and vital...

If you’ve thought something brilliant and then worked to bring that thought to fruition...

If you’re a mother, if you’ve called forth little parts of your flesh and soul into beautiful being...

If you’ve ever sung, quietly or loudly, hummed a tune, written a poem, written a word...

If you’ve ever spoken up for someone, stood up for what’s good in this world, fashioned a moment of truthfulness...

See? You’re a creatrix too.

I use creatrix as my own “inner” description of myself. I came upon the word when I was going through a deep depression, questioning my role as a woman, as an individual, as a human being. I was desperately trying to figure out my place in the world. I thought I was too old to have an identity crisis (I mean, shouldn’t I have my shit together by now?).

None of the labels I’d given myself really seemed to fit me anymore. Nothing described me completely. Wife, mother—those words can often come with baggage that dims our true being, puts us in a nice socially acceptable, pre-defined box. Even when I found my writing voice and realized Yes, this is it! I was still unsure about calling myself a writer.

But creatrix...that’s a powerful word. An embraceable word. There’s something about choosing a new word to describe yourself that causes a beneficial shift in your psyche.

When I began to think of myself as a creative force, unlimited and open to everything, I really felt alive.

My writing benefited because I was no longer hindered by a constant inner critic, or worries about what other people might think of me if I wrote honestly. My relationships benefited because I was able to speak from an authentic place. Isn’t that what we’re all striving for? To live authentically, honestly, to speak up for ourselves, and to create beauty?

So, not creator: creatrix. I’m reclaiming the feminine ending for this one (I’m a sucker for fancy Latin words).

Are you a creatrix too? What is it that you love to create?

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Dejah Beauchamp doesn't know the answer to anything, but she's perfectly content to wander aimlessly through life with the hope that she'll end up in the right place. She has written for elephant journal, Be You Media Group, and The Tattooed Buddha, and has had poetry published in Pilgrimage Magazine and Vine Leaves Literary Journal. She lives in New England, raising two sons and writing about all kinds of things on her blog. You can also connect with Dejah on Facebook, or Twitter.