Monday, August 2, 2010

The Mondays

This is what I feel like right now:

In other words, I feel tired and empty and a little crotchety, and I can't figure out why. I had plenty of sleep, and I laid off the caffeine more than usual yesterday (although the same cannot be said for popcorn). Before going to bed last night, a few ideas for my novel-in-progress trickled into my brain, so I scribbled them down on a sticky note to simmer overnight, eager to get working in the morning.

Flash forward to the morning. I snoozed my alarm within an inch of its life. In spite of two hours of stolen sleep, I still woke feeling bleary and all too Monday-ish. My muscles are sore from yesterday's strength workout, and coffee is only serving to make my stomach sore, too.

Regardless, I sat down at the computer, reviewing my sticky note of inspiration. Nodding to myself, I remembered what I wanted to write and began typing. The words flowed and what seemed (at the time, anyway -- who knows what revision will reveal) liked luscious description and dialogue spread over the word processor's page. I came to the end of the scene and sat back, satisfied. I clicked on the word count to see how much volume I had added to the manuscript, and grimaced -- 367 words. Normally I crank out at least 1,000 words before my brain needs a breather. This morning, I didn't even manage half of that. What's more, my brain was completely devoid of ideas about where to go next, either in the novel or here on the blog (I clearly solved the latter problem).

Now, still groggy and body feeling stubbornly sleep deprived despite all the evidence, I'm trying not to feel bad about this morning's writing numbers. It's challenging, perhaps more so than for other folks because of my eating disorder-related infatuation with numbers -- my weight, my BMI, workout times, calories burned, and so forth. I keeping reminding myself that, while 367 words is not a great deal of writing, in those words I accomplished what I had hoped for when I took a pencil to that sticky note last night. That is a success, I believe, no matter the numbers. I think I'll take my own advice and get some not-writing in, climb a mountain and let the story sit.

How's your Monday starting off?

4 comments:

  1. I could totally curl up next to that little guy! So cute! (found you through Heather's blog)

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  2. There are some days when the words just won't come. And I agree, just committing to getting some not-writing done is still getting something done!

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  3. yogiclarebear.comAugust 2, 2010 at 7:49 PM

    i usually love mondays. today was MEH, although i did get a good amount of work done. felt like crap too though. no sleep, but thats pretty typical. wow this is the most negative comment of all time. thats how crappy i am, i dont even care and im going to post this anyways, lol!glad you are recognizing your "numbers" thing and trying to let yourself just be. numbers or not, your body still has the right to feel a certain way. we may not always see or know what is happening inside. you could be fighting a bug or something.

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  4. What I like about this post is its 'real life' reality! Some days are just like this. I had one just the other day...I felt like sludge and nothing worked, including writing.I am a big proponent of letting the writing sit and not forcing it to the point of uber-frustration! All too often we get bogged down with our expectations...must write daily, must write x amount of words, must be perfect... there's almost this fear (for me, anyways) that if I don't keep on it, writing will disappear and never come back!But it does! It just doesn't follow a linear schedule for me, is all. Somedays are highly productive, others...not!Thx for a great post!Julie Johnsonbusywriting.net

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― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King